image 1.png
Yesterday, I was thinking, when it occurred to me that thinking is highly overrated. As far as I can tell, thinking is what humans do to make their lives miserable. To me, it seems like most one cell amoebas are happier than most humans these days, and I suspect that is because most one cell amoebas spend very little time thinking. Amoebas just exist, which is to say they just flop and plop around the microscopic world and spend little time engaged in higher thought. I would love to be able to just flop and plop onto the couch, but I can’t plop in peaceful lassitude without thinking about all the other things I ought to be doing instead.
Winter is the worst time for thinking. It’s when thoughts pile up, like a log jam in a river. A thought jam is when your stream of consciousness can’t flow naturally because all the debris flowing downstream clogs up the neurological pathways in your head. To clear up a thought jam, it helps to engage in productive activities, like taking out the trash. But on cold rainy days, it is too dreary to take out the trash, so thoughts just pile up, as does the trash.
The only advantage I see to thinking is that occasionally we can think about happy thoughts, often at the most inopportune times, like the time I thought about a talking jellyfish in church. He was just drifting along in my stream of consciousness, chatting about stuff, until he ran into my thought jam and voiced his displeasure with his habitat.
JELLYFISH: It’s too muddy in here–my tentacles are getting tangled in all the deadwood floating around in your head.
ME: Wait, who is this?
JELLYFISH: I’m the talking jellyfish you just thought about
ME: Why am I thinking about a talking jellyfish?
JELLYFISH: Because you’re a human, and humans have the great evolutionary advantage of conscious thought, which allows you to think about talking jellyfish.
ME: It doesn’t feel like an advantage.
JELLFYISH: It will be if you ever need to make small talk with a jellyfish in the future because most jellyfish, myself excluded, are quite taciturn.
ME: Geez, thanks for the insight. I think I’m supposed to be praying now.
The problem is once you chat with a talking jellyfish while you’re supposed to be communicating with the infallible Creator of the Universe, the talking jellyfish starts to get presumptuous. For instance, you never want to listen to a talking jellyfish practice his stand up routine while your preacher is in the middle of a thorough explication of the Book of Job. If you crack even the slightest trace of a grin, the preacher will know something is up. At that point, you’re just better off feigning a seizure than falling into fit of a laughter while poor Job is being put through the wringer. That said, maybe God sends us talking jellyfish, or other such irrational thoughts, to cheer us up when our rational thoughts are rather dreary.
Source link
2025-02-25 18:00:02
Karl Hoffman is a distinguished agriculturalist with over four decades of experience in sustainable farming practices. He holds a Ph.D. in Agronomy from Cornell University and has made significant contributions as a professor at Iowa State University. Hoffman’s groundbreaking research on integrated pest management and soil health has revolutionized modern agriculture. As a respected farm journalist, his column “Field Notes with Karl Hoffman” and his blog “The Modern Farmer” provide insightful, practical advice to a global audience. Hoffman’s work with the USDA and the United Nations FAO has enhanced food security worldwide. His awards include the USDA’s Distinguished Service Award and the World Food Prize, reflecting his profound impact on agriculture and sustainability.
